yeay...haha...
...*overslept*...
yesterday...
everything'z over...
i mean...practical ica...(not bad)
presentation ica...(no comments)
we r rushin lyk wad...
yah & still haf 2 more ica...
...*next week*...
i duno y...
sum pple r juz...
not happy...
but wtf it is...
i dun care...
she will olwez b lyk dat...
cum on change la pple...
damn suckarz...
alot of things nid 2 do...
projexz...website...research...
assignment...codingz...ICAs...
i wana run away man...
but i noe...it wont solve...
...*everythinz*...
i duno wadz gonabe
for my eaipj...
& i mean my task...
i find it soo farkin
...*complicated & hard*...
im juz scared...
im unable to make it...
but i @ least try...
i hate codingz...
& i hate ITz....
thank you so much...
now everyone is laughin @ me...
cuz i've make a fool of myself...
im sooo pissed til i hide myself...
juz wish dun wana look @ dem...
************
siti dun giveup - force vomit
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
6:51 PM
i wana run away...
as far as i can...
i wana being away...
from everyone...
& i wana runaway...
neva say goodbye...
i wanabe a different person...
i wanabe sum1 else...
i wanabe unknown gal...
no1 cud evo recognize me...
no1 cud evo knows me...&
no1 cud evo hurt me...
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
3:23 AM
its oredy in da mornin...
i was lyk...hello...
yah im stil ryt awake...
i can't sleep...
ok yah i manage to bout an hr...
skool gona start later...
no difference for me...
cuz whether theres break o not...
life stil da same...
i took da risk...yup...
1 more step & i die...
cuz no1 dares to u c...
y we muz b sooo chicken ryt?
i olwez listen to my heart...
rather den my brain...
cuz i feel sum1 whisper...
deep inside in my heart...
wonder who izit...geesh...
olwez tellin me to haf faith...
everythingz gona end real soon...
& those moments dat u want...
...*u wil gona get it*...
i was lyk...ok...
i will still holdin on...
ony dat whispers...
makes me wana stil livin on...
& it makes me calm
from all of my stress & sadness...
@ least sumtyn consolin me...
which i duno wad it is...lol
wenevo i break down & cry...
it olwez askin me y...
y m i cryin?
y m i soo easily being hurt?
& y i take things really hard?
& i answer...i duno...
i juz need to cry...
every drop of tears...
seems to release every hurt
dat i felt...
im stewpid...
im fugly phat...
im not a popular gal in class...
every1 make fun of me...
every1 make fool of me...
every1 laugh @ me...
cuz im an idiot...
************
listenin to:
listen to ur heart - roxette
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
4:35 AM
who is there goin 2 help u...
wen u in need?
who is there goin 2 listen 2 u...
wen u unhappy?
who is there 2 understand u...
wen u break down & cry?
who is there 2 console u...
wen pple callin u names?
who is there 2 stand 4 u...
wenevo u r not @ fault?
who is there 2 dry ur tears...
& make a smile on ur face...
& u get to laugh again???...
im turnin blind...
...SOOON...
im turnin deaf...
...SOOON...
i've been starin @ da screen 15/7...
i've been listenin to song 2 da MAX...
i didn't realise...
i break down & cry...
i duno y...
itz juz wenevo im thikin of my life...
i wud feel lyk wana cry...
& i did in da end...
is my life...dat pathetic?
im tired wif all those...
...*farkin projectz*...
even im fear to death...
wen i heard da word *projex*...
************
listenin to:
love u more - eminem
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
9:45 PM
...2 weeks of break...
it turned out 2 b damn...
...*suxxx*...
...laz week...
hangout few dayz...
& went skool 2-3 dayz...
da rest simply *tooo lazy*...
or overslept til 2-3 *PM*...
crackin my head...
@ nite til mornin...
doing codingz...
...tiz week...
*whole week burn*...
...Codingz...
...Practicalz...
...Report...
...Presentation...
...*lack of sleep*...
i noe theres a bag under my eyes
im tired with tiz life...
i wana quit...
u noe...wana *giveup*...
cuz i can't stand it...anymore...
i've lost faith...
freedom seems 2 b *nothing @ all*...
i start 2 hate my surroundingz...
every1 olwez blocking my way...
wenevo im goin to skool &...
come back home...
idiot sey...*perangai sak*...
especially wen u wana tap...
& wenevo wana go out or cum in
to da mrt...
so kanchiong 4 wad???
so typical s'porean...*kiasu*
...waliaowae...
m i too easy 2 b bullied?
m i too soft-hearted?
my kindness olwez been
taken 4 granted...
*i hate it u noe*...
sumtymes i feel...
i juz wana end tiz life...
cuz no1 nids me...&...
nobody lyks me...
everybody leave me...
they all out w/o me...
...*havin fun*...
im sick of my life...
u noe wad...*i giveup*...
for once...
i wanabe sum1 special...but
i dun wanabe da popular gal in skool
im juz being myself...
i think there's nothing sooo
special bout me...
yah...im simply nothing...
im juz da gal wif broken smile
************
listenin to:
sorry - madonna
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
2:27 AM
im flyin up high...
yeay...weeeeeeee...
since tiz afternoon...
i keepon laughin...
smiling ear-to-ear...
yah i noe...
sum pple might tot...
"tiz gal siao ar"...
haha so wad???...
ok, *2* farkin GOOD news...
firstly,
all of da stewpid hardly waitin
...*worth it afterall*...
ok i take back all of my werds...
u r not a farkin jerk btw...
u r a good dude...
yah da msg is sooo swit...
secondly,
though im stewpid in codings...
i manage to solve da part dat
me & nozie struggling...
since tiz afternoon...
can't wait to tel her...
wen we mit...
alah itz juz basically...
i copied from previous projekz...
nothin new btw...
haiz....
u make me fly so high...
i duno y i juz can't...
forget bout u sey...
i tried really hard...
but itz sooo farkin hard...
cuz he's too sweet & nice...
though i olwez swearin around...
but u too wad...hahaz...
i feel so scared...
afraid of loosing...
afraid of da nitemares...
afraid of being alone...
wad on earth am i livin man...
************
love u more - eminem
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
4:19 AM
my brain is totally DEAD...
help me...for once...
clear all of my thoughtz...
im suxxx @ codingz...
im stewpid...
da best werd 4 me evo...
i keepon waitin...
lyk 1 big farkcurse...
waitin 4 da heartless one...
no reply...no text...no msg...
i feel sooo dumb...
ok @ least a werd of thanks or sumtyn.
jerk..hes totally a farkin jerk...
yah thanks dude 4 playin wif my heart...
u heartless creature...
i hate u...
fine from now on...i try 2
erase ur name...
delete u from my memory space...
throw away all those excitin moments...
u and ur stewpid crapz...
yah fark off bitch...haha
yah byte me...faggot...
i tot u r sum1 special...
but u nearly make me cry...
i hate all of da waitinz...
didn't c ur true colors...
thanks for all of da waez...
u makin a fool of me...&...
thanks sooo much...
4 playin wif my heart...
************
listenin to:
give me novacaine - greendae
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
2:15 AM
ok now codings for EAIPJ...
I DUNO HOW!!!!
help me...HOW....
i juz feelin rejected...
...duno why...
im such an idiot...
do i really havin an...
...*attitude problem*...?
wen u around i feel so secure...
da excitement...oh gosh...
itz juz simply...
...*talk 2 me*...
...*talk 2 me*...
...*talk 2 me*...
and yeah u did...
as if u understand...
...nyahahaz...
yah i noe crapz...
been 3 days @ home...
damn i wana get out...
& have a life...
...haiz...
i noe ur big day is cumin...
...*congratz*...&...
...*all da best*...
who am i to tell u...
all of my feelings?
im juz a gal...
havin a broken smile...
juz b urself...
and i be mine...
u dun haf 2 change...
juz lyk ur *baby* ask u to...
i dun hate u...
nor do i love...
...*we buddies ryt*...?
************
listenin to:
she will be loved - maroon 5
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
7:58 PM
i dun lyk codings man...
omg...how can i live wif tiz???
plz...get me some new stuffz...
wonder who's da idiot...
invent tiz stuff???...
i kill u man...hahar...
ok im jokin aite...
smart-ugly-looks...
is much farkin better den...
beauty wif no brain...
cum on which 1 u choose???
i noe u lie...
but i dun mind...
thanks for makin me excited...
...every each day...
wantin to noe more...
wif those nitemares & thoughts...
i noe im fugly retard...
who wanz me ryt???
beauty is only wen
the lights are still ON...
beauty cums in da heart...
which hardly 2 b seen...
ok crap...hahah...morons
who on earth will in love
wif a fugly-retard lyk me ryt?
You say you hate me...
I just love you more...
You don't want me...
I just want you more...
Because you love me &
I love you more...
************
listening to:
nobody lyks u - greendae
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
4:02 AM
im juz an idiot...
wen it cumz into IT module...
im dumb in codings...
IT juz doesn't fit in my life...
such an IT-idiot...
for once i wanabe beautiful...
make me feel beautiful...
i tried but i can't...
will u gona make me feel beautiful?
i neva feel dat before...
2 b beautiful...
i wonder how it feels lyk...
hidden @ da corner...
watchin u...lookin @ me...
i noe u lookin @ me...
i can feel dat...
or maybe itz juz my feelings...
wtf...thanks btw...
for playin wif my feelings...
************
listenin to:
love you more - eminem
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
10:55 PM
nobody likes u...
everyone left u...
they all out without u...
havin fun...
she went off to hide...
alone in the park...
cryin out loud...
screamin in the dark...
she's tryin too hard...
but she's fallen apart...
no1 seems to see...
whom really u are...
she saying goodbye...
it means nothin @ all...
they left her alone &
dun even to care about...
back home late @ night...
starin @ da wall...
thinkin back who she is really are...
now she realise...
she's got nothing @ all...
cuz she's not beautiful...
she whispered wif her broken smile...
"i dun mind being alone all tiz years"
"i close uptight in the pourin rain"
"i try to look @ da brighter side"
"it will end for alil while"
she will be loved...
************
listenin to:
letterbomb - greendae
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
11:48 PM
i keepon dreamin of him...
aaaargh...*twice*
i noe...*dumb*...
i swear its *him*...
omg...out of all...
y izit muz b him???
ok maybe i think of him too much
emy-slap-her-face...
aaaaaargh...
i didn't sleep...
or i shall say...
i can't sleep...
not becoz im thinkin of him...
juz dat i scared dreamin of him...
& i mean again...
ok yah wad a crapz...
dun ask me who is he...cuz
i dun wana make a fool of myself
pple will laugh their ass out...
shut-da-hell-up...
i wana sweet dreams...
which i used to haf...
dry my tears...&
erase my sadness...
sleep lyk theres no tmr...
wen i awake...
wanabe a different me...
& forget all of my sorrows...
but i won't forget about u...
cuz da memories wif u...
it still follows...
************
listenin to:
she will be loved - maroon 5
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
11:37 PM
life is precious...
duno y i was born...
but i appreciate it...
who am i...???
to against GOD's will...
my happiness...
everyone has their...
...*Great Moments*...
i duno wen is mine...
i can't fine mine...
or maybe i won't have it...
my sadness...
wif my BIG fake smiles-&-laughs
& stewpid lies...
u might think im happy...
but im not gonabe ohkay...
since born...
im not as beauty as u...
im not as intelligent as u...
im not as fated as u...
no one is perfect though...
wads there to say...
almost give up wadevo i do...
always in favour of others...
being idiot & fool...
havin a failure in life...
for a second thought...
i juz duno who i am...
at certain moment...
i wanabe sum-one-else...
i dun get wad i wanted...
i never get wad i needed...
everybody olwez gave u...
wad u wanted...
u never had to work...
it was always there
y life's sooo hard??? and
y life's sooo unfair???
who sayz life is simple??? and
who says life is fair???
drain da pressure from da swelling
da sensations overwhelming
give me a kiss goodnight &
everything will be alright
tell me dat I won't feel a thing
so give me *novacaine*...
************
listenin to:
give me novacaine - greendae
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
11:38 PM
since yesterday...
soo happy wen it rains...
*i ony happy wen it rains*...
whole day slackin...
omg i miss moment lyk tiz...
& it feels damn farkin good...
spend more tyme wif da monsta...
yeah uddin's b'dae...
so i throw up a surprise...
by orderin *pizza*...
oooh i lurve da *HAWAIIAN*...
heeez...ok im bloated...
& he is very da *kechoh*
and soo excited...heee...
hes smilin ear-to-ear...
sucha notty boi...
wif dat cheeky smile...haha
i knew bout it...
before any1 does...
it was nearly 2 yrs ago...
but i juz kept silent...
cuz dun wana lose u...
feel sucha fool...
wen it gets attention...
cum on im farkin dumb...
dun make a fool of urself...
cuz every1 hatez me...
& i dun wan every1 hatez u too
becoz of me...
not more den juz a fren...
juz be my buddy...
it will do...
cuz it makes me happy...
************
listenin to:
ada apa dengan cinta - melly goeslow
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
6:57 PM
had 2 icas...
both r dumb...
java was not bad...
supply chain was...
...freak paper...
i study lyk 1 farkin hell
itz case study...
& wadevo shit i study simply...
...*wastin of tyme*...
writin grandmutha story...
and some definitions...
...*ta daaah*...
got da feelin i flunk both
...hmmm...
...god-noes-everything...
yeay...2 weeks break...
so wad im gonna do???
...
...
...
...WAD DA FARK...
lotz of deadline after break...
...*FREAK*...
projekx...
reportx...
presentationx...
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh...
i didn't mean to hurt u...
...im sorry...
...i feel guilty...
every1's start to make a fool
of me...i hate myself...
tell me...why me???
************
listenin to:
dan - sheila on 7
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
11:42 PM
i juz feel sooo *stewpid*
im useless in my clique...
simply good 4 nothing...
im *fat* & im *ugly*...
wad da fark???
i hate my hair...
i hate my looks...
i hate myself...
i dun haf any style...
cuz im suxxx...
dun bother me...
im juz typical farkin lozar...
...sucha retard...
...*ugly fat monsta*...
suxxx in my studies...
no use goin to skool...
u think im sucha burden???
yah I AM...
lyk wad pple use to say...
"kechik-kechik taknak mampos"
"dah besar menyusahkan orang"
wen young dun wana die...
grownup, farkin burden...
im useless...
ok maybe im good @ sumtyn...
*give more trouble*...&...
*a burden for oterz*...
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
4:41 PM
it was awesome...
cuz we took lotsa picz
though itz tiring...
freak dumb la da outin...
out of all NW pikz...
i lyk tiz 1...
out of all our pikz...
i lyk tiz 1...
so...freak bored w/o her...
i-loveya-gal...
u olwez leave me alone...
yah & olwez cum late...
but nvm...
i try to handle things...
...*independently*...
dun get tired of all my complains
heeex...
************
listenin to:
fallin pieces - avril lavigne
ouh juz another babble,
MyssPg. \m/
8:47 PM
